From Setbacks to Setups: The Growth Mindset Shift You Need

Setbacks are inevitable. You may miss an opportunity. A project may not go as planned. You may have a personal goal that fell short. It can all be frustrating. And if you’re not careful, those setbacks can chip away at your confidence and momentum.

Over the years, here’s what I’ve learned: Setbacks don’t define you. Your response to them does. Instead of seeing them as failures, see them as feedback. There’s a lesson in every challenge—but it’s up to you to find it.

Failure → Feedback

The most successful leaders, entrepreneurs, and high performers don’t avoid setbacks—they use them to their advantage. They use them as stepping stones.

Things in life don’t happen to us, they happen for us!

Instead of asking, “Why did this happen to me?” ask:
✅ What can I learn from this experience?
✅ What can I adjust so this doesn’t happen in the future?
✅ What strengths can I develop through this challenge?

Let’s say you missed a big opportunity because of poor time management. The lesson? Maybe you need a better system for prioritizing high impact tasks. Maybe you got negative feedback from a client. Instead of taking it personally, use it to refine your approach and improve your service.

The sooner you realize you can’t control every decision, action, or inaction of others the better. The key is focusing on what’s within your control. Control what you can and let go of what you can’t. Every setback is a chance to grow—if you choose to see it that way.

But What If Challenges Keep Coming?

Bouncing back once is one thing, but what happens when you face setback after setback? How do you stay resilient when it feels like life keeps throwing punches?

That’s the next level—building sustainable resilience.

Here’s a personal story that happened early in my leadership journey. I remember leading a team during as a senior enlisted leader. We had trained hard, but when the moment came, things didn’t go as planned. It was March 2020, COVID pandemic shut everything down, and our missions were cancelled. It was a humbling experience—one that could’ve made me question my abilities as a leader. Instead, I shifted my mindset. I asked myself, “What can we learn from this?” “How can we apply that lesson moving forward?” That approach not only helped me recover but also made me a stronger leader. That same lesson applies in business and life—setbacks don’t define us; our response does.